Wednesday, January 4, 2017

I'M NO MATCHMAKER by Hannah Rowan

Reality TV overflows with matchmaking shows....The Bachelor, Bachelorette, Patti Stanger and her Millionaire Matchmaker agency. People are getting together based on one kiss from a stranger.  Parents are choosing spouses for their adult children.  Couples are marrying based on matches made by experts, who put together two people who meet for the first time at their weddings.

Online dating sites proliferate, with people finding possible partners after filling out questionairres about their interests and preferences .  Singles may find common interests on Facebook.  And then there are shorter-term connections made on apps like Tinder.

Romance writers take on the task of putting two people together in creative ways.  Maybe it's the boy-next-door, or the cop/soldier/FBI agent who's charged with keeping someone safe, or two people stranded on a desert island or in a blizzard.  The heart of a romance novel depends on showing how two people meet and how even the most unlikely couple discovers that they are meant for each other. 

So wouldn't you think a romance writer, in real life, would be able to zero in on what might make a couple tick and put together two people who are destined for each other?  Or who at least might spend some pleasant time together for a little while?

I've found that real life doesn't imitate art at all.  

On the home front, my daughter was horrified by the idea that the Pakistani man who owns the gas station down the street was embroiled in the process of finding husbands for his five daughters--a task he assured me was quite difficult, especially since the daughters had to approve of the men he chose for them.  She would not have been a candidate for the show Married By Mom and Dad.  In fact, nothing seemed to quash a budding romance for her quicker than Mom or Dad saying "He seems like a nice boy.

Our son, on the other hand, introduced us to many, many girls, but I'm not sure he paid the least bit of attention to whether we thought they'd make a good life-partner for him.

Oddly enough, both children, with no help from their parents whatsoever, found mates who fit them perfectly and seem to make them quite happy.

But in the friend department, every time my husband and I have introduced two people we think would click, the budding relationship generally came to an embarrassingly abrupt halt.  So much so, that whenever I find myself telling my spouse that "your friend would really like my friend" I have to stop myself before I intitiate yet another social disaster.

From now on, I plan to limit my matchmaking efforts to the characters in my stories.


  1. For years while they were in high school, we acted as if our son's girlfriend was "okay," because we were afraid if he knew how much we liked her, HE'D like her less. It must have worked--they've been married 18 years. A great post, Hannah.

  2. So true,Hannah. Life does not immitate art, and there is no predicting the necessary 'chemistry' for two people to click.

  3. Surprisingly, many of those arranged marriages turn out successfully. It's alien and distasteful to us.

  4. Thanks for the smile, Hannah. I'll never try to be a matchmaker. I prefer matchmaking in fiction.


Subscribe to this Blog!

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner